SpecialNeeds.com

Most parents can vividly recall the day they were told that their child’s development was not typical. Many already had a suspicion that something was different, but being told by the physician that their child indeed had special needs validated their worst fears. Dreams and hopes felt destroyed and feelings of a promising future for their child turned uncertain.

After receiving a child’s diagnosis, parents are immediately called to action. They embark on their special needs journey, often without the guidance they need and deserve. They are expected naturally to have the tools to navigate a world that is unfamiliar and confusing. Living among families of typically developing children can cause feelings of loss, grief, vulnerability, isolation and feeling misunderstood. All too often, the special needs journey begins by surviving each day rather than truly living and experiencing the beauty children bring to it.  
Parents are expected to instantly learn about their child’s disability and how to access and institute appropriate therapeutic services, while they continue to work, manage their household and struggle with emotional pain. The responsibility is enormous, but they give it their best effort; parents want nothing more then to see their deserving child thrive.

There are numerous decisions to make while raising a special needs child, which often leaves parents questioning their choices and contemplating whether they are doing enough. It is important to find a professional partner who can help bridge gaps in the child’s therapeutic programming, and brainstorm about the child’s and family’s needs, which may help relieve parents’ self-doubt. The professional should be qualified to evaluate the complexities within the family from a biological, social and psychological standpoint. This type of relationship helps bring insight and perspective while promoting healthy coping skills for the entire family.

Parents’ emotions do evolve along the journey. There is no epiphany that causes an emotional change, but the professional partnership, a strong support system and passage of time all contribute to the healing process. The heart starts to mend and parents begin to marvel at their child’s strengths, no longer primarily focusing on the missed opportunities and the developmental delays. Fear, uncertainty and a sense of loss may be present, but these emotions are now coupled with acceptance and empowerment. Hope emerges and dreams form once again.

Dr. Gallit Luftman is a board certified family physician and the founder of Comprehensive Special Needs Consulting, LLC. She can be reached at luftman.csnc@pacbell.net.